Chad Ford’s At It Again

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We Should All Hope That Ford's Theory Works
We Should All Hope That Ford’s Theory Works

Many of you non-“ESPN Insiders” out there may have missed Chad Ford’s recent pump-and-dump Combine Stock update (Insider only) of Tyler Hansbrough.

In his update you’ll find such gems as:

Hansbrough measured a legit 6-foot-8¼ in socks and 6-9½ in shoes. He also had a surprising 6-11½ wingspan and a standing reach of 8-10 — one inch better than Blake Griffin.

Professor Ford does his best with nuggets like these to sell us on the theory that since “Psycho T” has a similar wingspan, height and standing jump as many other established NBA players and top prospects, he will no doubt be equally as good.

If Ford’s Theory proves to be true, then this is really great news for the rest of us.
For instance:

1. My wife is 5’3″, which is the same height as Muggsy Bogues.  So there’s a good chance that she’ll be electrifying NBA crowds with a stellar 2:1 assist to turnover ratio for over 10 NBA seasons.  GREAT!  No more work for me!  I’ll quit and become her agent!  We’ll be like the Christies!!!

2. Speaking of agents, my buddy Greg is Jewish with similar male pattern baldness as Jeremy Piven.  He’s looking for a career change.  He’s the next Ari Gold!  Woo-Hoo!

3. My in-laws have a minivan that runs on fossil fuels which is the same fossil fuel used to power Formula 1 and Nascar vehicles.  YEE-HAW!  See you suckers at Le Mans!

The possibilities are endless.  I just want to extend Professor Ford thanks in advance if and when this new theory proves correct.  You’re the best Chad!

Oh, and btw, I think I speak for everyone when I say that EVERY BOBCATS FAN’S WORST CASE SCENARIO is:

With the 12th selection in the 2009 NBA draft, the Charlotte Bobcats select…Tyler Hansbrough, the University of North Carolina.

–ASChin

Larry Brown as Mr. Vegas

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Brown in Las Vegas

First off, I’m not the most knowledgeable guy when it comes to the Bobcats or the NBA for that matter. With that being said, I have been keeping up with the Bobcats recently and I’ve been happy to see Larry Brown being so involved with the Bobcats Summer League team in Las Vegas. From what I’ve read, he has been overloading the team with his style of offense. Apparently, this is what he learned from Dean Smith in his days at UNC. You give the new guys tons of information at first, then as time goes, you work on perfecting it. According to the players, it’s been quite the adjustment, but one that they are excited about. Brown doesn’t expect them to fully grasp his offense in just a couple of days, but one message he has gotten across is to go all out. Brown was quoted as saying, “if you’re going to make a mistake, make it giving 100%.” That’s pretty generic coach speak, but given the Bobcats roster, I think outworking other teams will give them a few extra wins off of effort alone. The players are responding well to Brown, and hopefully come preseason time, when Morrison, May, and the rest of the veterans are ready, this hard work trend can continue. Who knows, maybe the Bobcats can start the season on a win streak, build some confidence, and keep some momentum going, taking them into their first playoff series. For now though, let’s hope Larry Brown can keep the hard work going, keep the players healthy, and keep Michael Jordan and his company spending account out of the casinos. Get it?